pigatschmo

Monday, July 31, 2006

the Fluffy fiasco

Last night at 4 a.m. we heard an animal in the bedroom. I pointed a flashlight at the little scratchy noises and saw that Fluffy, our resident pet hamster, had somehow escaped from his cage. He looked very healthy and happy to be having an adventure. He had travelled the equivalent of several hamster miles. Lisa picked him up without difficulty. We walked him back to his cage, and saw that a piece of the plastic exercise wheel had broken away, explaining where he escaped but not necessarily how. His water bottle was empty and apparently he was extremely thirsty -- raising the question, did his thirst drive him to bust out, or did his adventure make him thirsty?

Monday, July 17, 2006

Hans Blix deserves an Apology

And the Dubayah Bush went out into the desert, and he encountered a Burning Bush. And the Dubayah Bush stood staring at the Burning Bush, not sure what to make of it. And then the Lord said "Dubayah -- Hear me out. You're always dropping my name publicly, and yammering on about how you listen to me. Now listen to me. Sit down!" And Bush sat down next to the Bush. The Lord continued, "What a fine mess you and your cronies have made of the world. Didn't anyone ever explain to you that I'm more of a democratic socialist than a free market capitalist?" And the Dubayah Bush said "Well, I... I mean... What I'm trying to say is..." And the Lord said "I don't think you fully understand the effect you've had on the world, and I don't mean that as a compliment. But you are still my child, so I forgive you. I am going to give you a chance to redeem your name, and start the long process of healing the world. How does that sound?" And the Dubayah said "Well, I... I'm... I'm honored and flattered by your offer. I truly am." "Now listen" said the Lord, "and do as I say. Will you do as I say?" "Why of Course Lord. Of course I'll do as you say. What would you like me to do?" And the Lord replied, "There are many things I want you to do -- many, many things. But to start with, before you do anything else... I want you to publicly apologize to Hans Blix. Hans Blix deserves an apology. He is a good man, and was doing good work when you brushed him aside." The Dubayah took this in, and said "And what else do you want me to do, Lord?" And the Lord said, "Tell John Bolton not to be a cold-hearted bully, but to chill out and understand that the UN is My gift to man." And the Dubayah said "OK".